Afternoon funnies

Q. What did the banana say to the vibrator?
A. Why are you shaking she's going to eat me.

Q. What is the difference between a woman and a washing machine?
A. You can bung your load in a washing machine and it won't call you a week later.

Q. Why don't women wear watches?
A. There's a clock on the stove!

Q. Why do men pay more for car insurance?
A. Women don't get blow jobs while they're driving

Q. How does a guy know if he has a high sperm count?
A. If the girl has to chew, before she swallows.

And my favorite...

Q. Three words to ruin a man's ego...
A. "Is it in?"